Posted by Today is the name day of my best friend. She is no longer alive. She died a few months ago, after many years of struggle with cancer. My thoughts are with her today, more than the other days.
Her name day was always a special day. She would throw a wonderful Christmas Eve party, and we would end up drunk and happy in the early hours of Christmas, for an early celebration.
She would then go for a quick nap, freshen up, and prepare the family Christmas meal, which was invariably attended by her parents.
I do not think she was a good cook, but she was a great hostess. And we shared a distinct preference for scotch (Dewars) as an aperitif and wine with the meal.
Her favorite female singer was Billie Holiday, and many times she would whisper to the tune of “I am a fool to want you“.
Opera was always heard and discussed in her house, and I recall our long discussions on Maria Callas. I remember one time she visited me in London and we went to watch “La Traviata” at the Royal Opera House. It just so happened that the same opera was staged by Opera North in Birmingham, so the next evening we drove there and heard “La Traviata” for a second time in two days.
I will never forget this visit, because at the time she was going through a horrible internal conflict and was constantly agonizing over what to do.
At the end she decided to go for the most difficult and painful option, because she could not bare the thought of not trying it and later regretting it. She was a rebel who appreciated and acknowledged the so called “comfortable, smooth, uneventful” life, but knew that it was not meant for her.
The years passed by and I returned to Athens. For eight years after my return we spent a lot of time together, good times and bad. She would confide in me her hopes, fears, illusions, nightmares. I am an introvert and would rarely reciprocate, inviting her caustic remarks, which I accepted nodding.
Something snapped on the ninth year. She withdrew to herself and stopped sharing. There was nothing I could do about it. All my efforts were crushed on the wall she had erected around her.
Things reached the ultimate low when my professional obligations required a lot of traveling. I would only spend weekends in Athens, if at all. It was during this period that cancel struck. She underwent surgery and then started chemotherapy. She fought hard for years.
As I write these words, I have the warm feeling of her aura, as if she is in the next room reading and listening to music, or preparing for her Christmas Eve party.
A few hours later the guests are gone, it is only the two of us in the living room, she takes her shoes off, curls up in the couch and starts humming “I am a fool to want you”. I take a blanket and spread it over her curled body. A few minutes later she is deep asleep. I spend some time absorbing her image before I leave. “Good night Christina, Good night!”.